Self-Care: Add that zing to your mood

 Author: Reenu M.

Since the Covid-19  outbreak early this year, we have been extra careful about shielding our body from the often deadly coronavirus.

We practice physical hygiene diligently. We wash our hands frequently, wear face masks and maintain social distance. If we even suspect that we may be coming down with a cold, we become rigorous in first aid like salt-water gargling, steam inhalation, hot food, and beverages and over the counter medications. If infection persists, then we consult the experts for diagnosis, medication and even hospitalisation and intubation.

Thus, we are protecting our physical self by ordered practice of

• Physical Hygiene
• First Aid
• Consultation with Experts

What about our emotional self?

In the last few months, many if not all of us have been victims to turbulent emotions like sadness, anger, frustration, stressed, anxious, fear. Some of us have consulted counsellors when these emotions have disturbed us so much that we have become dysfunctional. However, there are people who have suppressed these feelings. Even after becoming dysfunctional, they continued to wallow in these negative emotions to the point of suicide.

Maybe it is the stigma attached to talking about mental health issues or maybe it is lack of awareness. We have to stop stigmatising talking about mental health issues; many of these may be remedied by emotional first aid and hygiene practices. Still, if people are unable to cope with their emotions, help is available; talk to a counsellor. They are ready to listen without judgement or prejudice; so, come & have the conversation.

It may be prudent to point out that we suffer emotional injuries more frequently than we do physically. If we are aware of the first-aid practices, then we could dull the pain from them faster before it starts interfering in our daily life routines.

An emotional injury stems from a trigger event and affects our Thoughts, Feelings and Actions in a cyclic manner i.e. Thoughts affect Feelings & Actions, Feelings affect Thoughts & Actions and Actions affect Thoughts  & Feelings. Emotional First Aid may be applied at any level - Thoughts, Feelings or Actions and it dulls the pain from emotional injuries. 

Let us take an example which some of us (especially those balancing work-from-home with household tasks) may have faced since the lockdown in March -

• Trigger Event: My family members and I have a huge fight over my lack of contribution in household chores & I was called ‘absolutely useless’ (EMOTIONAL INJURY).
• My feelings: I feel hurt, anxious, & depressed.
• My Actions: I make mistakes in my work which makes my boss angry. I failed him.
• My Thoughts: I am unlovable, unworthy & an utter failure.

I apply Emotional First Aid at Actions level. I visualise positively how my situation should ideally be i.e. I am appreciated by my family members and my boss for the hard work and longer-than-usual hours that I am putting in.

 Here is the change that happens in -

• My Feelings: I feel peaceful and confident about myself.
• My Actions: I divide my time in a smart manner between household & office tasks giving both appropriate priority at the right time.
• My Thoughts: I am worthy. I am sure I can do a great job that will be appreciated
• What happens? My family & my boss are pleased with my work & they appreciate me.

Anyone can practise Emotional First Aid. True. However, we can prevent harm from emotional injuries by practising Emotional Hygiene daily through -

1. Meditating: Different techniques focusing on mindfulness, spirituality, transcendence, progressive relaxation twice daily (morning after rising and evening before going to bed shown to be most effective)
2. Exercising: Take 20-30 minutes daily to activate your muscles and release the stress through exercise, yoga.
3. Indulging nature: Tend to plants or pets for some time each day. Their positive energy will rejuvenate you.
4. Motivating Self: Practise saying good, motivational words to yourself in the mirror (real self). Hearing great and positive things about yourself is good for lifting many a dark mood.
5. Positive Visualising: Close your eyes and see a very happy version of yourself through your mind' eye and introspect on what can bring about this happiness. Your mind will make pathways to make this happen.
6. Cataloguing Emotions: Write every aspect (your feelings, thoughts) of events that disturb you or make you happy. Slowly, a pattern of your reactions will emerge which will enable you to formulate a plan of action for resolution (in case of disturbance) and replication (in case of happiness).
7. Fostering Relationships: Engage in meaningful and supportive relationships and nurture them constantly by being there and calling out for help. Talking to a support group is one of the best forms of therapy for emotional injuries.
8. Engaging your passion: Find a hobby that excites you like singing, dancing, painting reading. Indulge in it for some time daily; it will relax and rejuvenate you.
9. Being grateful: Thank everyone who makes you happy; it could be your parents, spouse, children, friends, pet or even a random stranger. The positive energy vibrations will uplift you.
10. Volunteering: Give back to the society in whatever you can.

 

Your self-care routine should ideally encompass both your physical & emotional self for contentment and happiness. Practice till it becomes a habit and slowly you will see that it becomes a personality trait.

 

Zinger for the Day: Practise self-care daily to add that zing to your moods. Feel free to feel it.